Pre Marriage

Live your best marriage

Discover Your Couple D.N.A: Enhance & future proof your marriage

Congratulations!

Finding a person so special that you want to spend the rest of your life with them is rare. As you know… we don’t just fall in love with anyone. 

Our attachment to our primary person is one of the most important bonds we ever make in life.

And marriage is one of the most important commitments we will ever make. 

And it needs to be taken seriously. 

And it needs to be protected. 

50 % of marriages fail. That is, 1 in 2 marriages end in divorce. That is really concerning.

At the start of our relationship we see the best in our partner. And they mirror back the best in us. It feels wonderful. It feels like we are getting all of our important needs met – to feel seen, heard and valued (as well as some unconscious needs from childhood!). We are both focused on meeting the other’ needs & giving each other our full attention, affection and allowing.

So it is unimaginable that our connection could waver. That we could experience the stress and conflict that others do that led to separation. But over time our differences become more apparent. Yet difference is NOT the problem. It’s a huge part of our attraction. (We can grow more as human beings if we can honour and learn from our partner’s differences.) The problem is that we misunderstand and misinterpret the differences. We create assumptions about our partner’s behaviour – about what it means, or what their intention is, and usually we are wrong. And we have expectations of what are partner ‘should’ do and how they ‘should’ do it – but we don’t know these expectations (they are based on what we would do) and we don’t discuss them until they are not met and then we are angry, hurt ….“They don’t remember things I told them/they’re not proactive/not sharing their feelings = they don’t care about me”. And they are wrong.

So after decades of research, we now know why marriages deteriorate – it is predictable and avoidable. We know HOW to protect marriages and prevent hurt.

As a relationship and personality psychologist I’ve spent a decade researching and working clinically with couples. I have discovered is that there are 10 things about you and your partner that you need to know at the start of your relationship so you avoid misunderstandings and hurt.

I am passionate about helping couples understand each other’s inner worlds accurately and with compassion. So I created the Couple D.N.A method based on what married partners wish they knew about each other’s differences and needs at the start of their relationship. Countless couples have shared it would have prevented conflict. This method includes personality assessments (which are positive!), the ATTUNED communication formula AND the best science of what makes marriages thrive.

Most relationship work is generic – aimed at what ALL couples should do. This method is tailored specifically to each of you – there is no other couple like you in the world. Your dynamics are unique – and if understood in the early days will protect and future-proof your marriage.

True intimacy means In To Me See. The Couple D.N.A method helps you to truly know the beautiful person you are marrying and the gifts they have.

This work primarily covers 4 critical aspects:

  1. Increasing self awareness 
  2. Increasing your accurate understanding of one another’s feelings and reactions (when they are different to yours!)
  3. Knowledge of each others needs….& how to meet each other’s in ways that work
  4. Predicting and preventing relationship rubs/conflict

I want your marriage to flourish – for your connection to be unwaverable, for you to be best friends, to be the source of each others’ comfort, to always have each others’ back, and to be home for each other – until death do you part. And if children come along – the most self aware, attuned parents raise the happiest children. 

Make your marriage vows be not only meaningful commitments to one another – but know how to keep your vows in place through the hard times as well as the good.

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